MY LEGS ARE GOING TO FALL OFF

Look at this! Why is this happening to me? What did I do to deserve this?????

I'm still getting eaten alive by bugs every night, and now I have this big ass bruise and some weird rash looking thing.

I don't know why I'm dedicating an entire blog post to this but THERE YOU GO. 

I'm really going to miss my legs. They've done me good.